Warning Signs of a Batterer or Relationship Violence

  1. He is jealous and dependent. He won't let his partner see or talk to others. He disapproves of her family and friends.
  2. He has unrealistic expectations of himself and of others. Feels he must live up to a macho image.
  3. He believes that a man should make all of the decisions.
  4. He has a poor self image. (He may try to conceal this by admitting no faults about himself).
  5. He has outbursts of anger for no reason, and makes hi partner feel afraid when he becomes angry. He seems to have a dual personality.
  6. He abuses alcohol or drugs.
  7. He wants to control his partners actions and invades her privacy. He expects her to spend all of her free time with him or keep him informed of her whereabouts at all times. He controls who she sees, what she wears, reads, does, etc.
  8. He insists upon knowing the intimate details of her past.
  9. He ridicules, humiliates, puts her down, calls her names, ignores her, or blames her for anything that goes wrong.
  10. He hides or destroys things that are important to her.
  11. He treats her as his property.
  12. He threatens to take her/their children or harm her or himself.
  13. He has been violent with other people, objects - throws or destroys things, punches walls, etc.
  14. He is physically rough with her "in fun" - such as pinching, biting, or pushing her. In reality, these behaviors can be harmful to her and are considered abusive.